The Thoughts Are Always There

My mind goes crazy. I can't control it.
It travels like crazy.
It goes on road trips.
And it is hard to get it back.
I don't want it to be like this.

Everyday, it seems to build up.
The numb feeling comes and goes.
Gets more stressful as it continues.

I have always wanted you in my life.
The way it ended sucked.
Maybe it will be for the best?

Songs play. I think of you.
your picture is still in my truck.
Should i take it down?
I don't want to. Don't ask why.
My reasonings are confusing.
I am sorry. I do care.

I want to scream, run, laugh, cry.
It is all a blur.
Life. It goes by too fast.

They do not understand.
They force me to go.
I don't listen. As always.
They want me to be who I am not.
Who I can not be.
Who I don't want to be.

I want to leave in hopes it will all get better. Soon.
It seems to run away from my problems.
It solves them for the time being.

I would like to say I am done.
But the truth of the matter is...
It has just begun.